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Babies or no Babies- That is the Question?
The daunting question we all face as human beings– BABIES OR NO BABIES?
I don’t have kids. Never birthed a little mini-me yet but I haven’t ruled it out. Don’t get me wrong, I think about it all the time. I have this illustrious image in my mind of being the best mom I can be- right?! Don’t we all, like perfect cupcake parties and peaceful bedtime stories but I know that’s far from reality…
The reality I witnessed on my nightly walk last night (yes I have time for those still since I don’t have kids…) really made me think twice about the correlation between a perfect life and a brood of babies.
My boyfriend and I crossed paths with another couple. They seemed flawless from a distance, cute and put-together with their little minions in tow. A carriage, the dog, wow! I bet they even have a white picket fence!? She’s the luckiest ever I thought to myself, she has it all…
As we got closer their picture came into focus. Mom’s got a baby strapped to her like a kangaroo and she’s being dragged by a black Labrador (which they obviously have to make time for). Dad is pushing a double stroller with 2 babies with a white husky by his side. The dogs are reckless and pulling them everywhere. Mom’s pissed, she’s yelling at dad, the 3 babies are confused and BAM- here I am, walking by this show with my little 4lbs Chihuahua, my boyfriend, and my skinny ass. Mom dares not look at me, I wish she did- I would have smiled to say – wow you’re a champ. But instead she seemingly dreads my look, keeps her head down and walks by as quickly as possible.
I see her night unfolding in my head, 3 lunches to makes, 3 beds to prepare, 3 baths to run. Then when her little scampers are sleeping she’ll be loaded with laundry and cleaning and meal prep for the next early day. Not to mention cleaning dirty diapers and slanging dog shit from what I saw. Is that really what I want for my foreseeable future to resemble?
My night involves maybe some yoga, gardening, dinner, like so many people in the country I’ll watch TV (if you’re interested to learn more about our TV habits as a nation, you can click here for the statistics – they’re pretty impressive), make a lunch only if I feel like it and haul my lazy ass into my unmade bed by 10pm cause good lord, I’m tired and had a long day at work. But to that mother and father I’m probably frolicking through my fairytale life that’s nothing short of a walk on the beach.
In that moment my entire existence flashed… did hers? Is that what I want for myself? Cause she appeared to be the last thing from happy. I know she loves her kids but when does this become right for one woman and wrong for another? Is it normal that mothers can’t just skim through life flying by their asses, as I’ve done for the last 32yrs and still raise a normal child?
One thing I’m sure of, I’m happy today. Will a child bring more happiness I could ask myself but that’s really not a fair question?
You never hear someone who has kids say “I wish I hadn’t”, you also rarely hear a couple of “dinks” (dual income with no kids) say “damn, I missed my reason for living- children”. Until I really know, I’ll continue to enjoy my nightly walks and sex life for every other reason other than to procreate. Some people may take this the wrong way, but I enjoy having sex and all of the crazy ideas for couples that we can try in the bedroom. That’s why I don’t think I’m ready to give it all up yet, as I’m just living my life the way I want to for now. Foreplay, the sexo game and roleplaying is just too much fun, after all. And I’m currently loving it! I feel I am open to experimenting now that I have started to acquire a taste for a fun sex life! A little bit more time and you might just see me looking up websites that give out information to Build your own sex doll!
But you never know. One day, I may possibly give up my crazy sexy life and charmed self-serving existence in exchange for the true love of a child. When that day comes, I’ll do my best to smile at women who pass me by…
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